11/22/2005

Hit Him Back

Sometimes, violence is the answer.
A lot of people disagree with me, I am sure. That's because they are naive or have never faced violence themselves. Many take the idea of turning the other cheek to an extreme. Sometimes, you have to get angry.
That's why Ontario's new anti-bullying legislation is a fundamentally dumb idea.
"Let's talk about it," says the new laws defenders.
"No!" says I. Let's do something about it. I am sick of talk.
We are raising a generation of spineless wimps who can't stand up for themselves. They grovel in the dirt, thinking what they're told. bowing to anyone richer, stronger or more powerful than they. They have no gumption. The "let's talk about it" mentality only feeds this. No one is telling these kids to get up and stand on their own two feet. No one is telling them that they are actually worth something.
I remember once, two of my younger sisters and my brother were stone picking for a sod company. A chap they were working with hit one of my sisters. My brother, although younger, is very protective, and hit him back... significantly harder than he'd hit my sister. My mom, when she first heard of it, was upset.
My dad was proud.
As far as he was concerned, my brother had done exactly the right and manly thing and protected our sister.
There aren't enough people out there teaching the weak to defend themselves. There aren't enough strong people out there defending the weak. There are too many who would rather "talk about it."
There's nothing to talk about.
Hit the guy back.
Only do it once.
You will not need to do it again.

h/t: Les

5 comments:

Question Period said...

Just one question Ruth: When a teenaged girl is being assaulted by 16 other teens, should she hit them back one at a time or should she try hitting them all at once?

Ruth said...

QP, they did not go up to her en masse.
She should have whaled the first one, and that would have ended it. It is likely that she felt emabarrassed, afraid and guilty when the first guy solicited her. She said nothing, and thus made herself an easy target for subsequent attacks.
The thing about sexual assault is that it is based on fear. Sexual attackers almost never go for equals and, should you ever take a self-defense or martial arts class, this is one of the first things you will learn. Most predators, granted not all, are easily scared off by a show of strength.
This girl should have been taught how to handle herself. Bad things happen, and there is no way to prevent it. You can fight it however, and she needs the tools to do so. Women are far more likely to be attacked than men, and too many women don't know what to do.

This is such a serious subject. It offends me that you take it so lightly.

Peter Thurley said...

After a lot of thought and writing, I decided to post a response to this post on my blog. I think you are way off, and I invite you to keep an open mind and check out what I have to say.

Ruth said...

I was also picked on plenty in school, so don't think you are somehow alone.

"Unfortunately, for Ruth, those who are bullied are not the kind of people to step up and pop someone in the nose. That’s not the way it works with those who are bullied."
That was EXACTLY my point. These kids need the tools to stand up for themselves. They need to be given a sense of self worth.

I hate to break it to you but there is a world of difference between being picked and sexual harrassment. Far too many women wait too long before saying anything about what's happening to them. This girl was harrassed for something close to 18 months. She was assaulted IN SCHOOL for crying out loud and it took her 18 months of continued harrassment before she said anything. She never once screamed for a teacher, never once told these guys where to go.
So many things went wrong in the case of this young girl. If she had dealt with it the first time, it would not have happened again. Sexual predators, are not typical bullies. If you doubt this, then I challenge you to go down to a woman's shelter or some womens self defense class and talk to a few women about why they are there. You will be shocked at what you hear, and the difference between the women who have learned their worth through pain and the women who will never learn.

I meant to add that there is a difference between bullying and the gossip that went on behind your back. The first is within your power to change. The second is not. People have negative opinions. It just happens. It's a blow to the ego sometimes, but not everyone likes you.

Hopefully what I have to say next comes out right. Have you ever stopped and really thought hard about why it took you so long to stand up for yourself, and why, when you did it was much more of an extreme lashing out? Did you carry around negative/angry/hateful feelings before you struck out?
Please note that no where in what I write do I say revenge is acceptable. From what I read, this is what you did: you got revenge.
There is an important difference between self defence and revenge. The first is based on self control. The second, revenge, is based on anger and pride. The one seeking revenge invariably lacks self control. It is also forbidden by the Bible.
Self defense is an acceptable use of violence to end a problem. Should you ever take a martial art, you would learn that self defense requires very careful control of oneself so that you do not become angry. The Bible does not forbid violence, it does not forbid anger. Self defense is therefore acceptable.

Helen Keller said...

Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature.... Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.

Listed on BlogsCanada Blogarama - The Blog Directory Powered by Blogger FeedBurner Blogging Tories
Southern Ontario Conservatives